Priviledge

We're hearing a lot about White Privilege these days. I never really heard of it until probably a few years ago and never thought too much of it as I didn't feel privileged. But it's bubbled up and we've been having a lot of discussions at home with our boys. Wanting to help guide their thoughts and opinions into one that reflects Christ I've been thinking about it a lot and reading a lot about it and what it means to other people.

What I have determined is that privilege is something like grace. You don't earn it, it's given and you can't give it back. There are lots of privileges in this world. Here are some I have thought of and what they mean to me (currently), I am ever evolving my opinions on everything!

Male Privilege: men have it, women don't
What it means in the world for those who don't have it: women will always park under a lamppost, have keys and phone out with 911 at the ready in a "shady" location, they will check the back seat, lock the doors as soon as possible
What it means in my house: I am the first one to ask for a break when we carry a couch or dresser

Parents still married privilege: some kids have it, some don't
What it means in the world for those who don't have it: shuffling back and forth between houses, remembering which parent they will be with at a holiday or particular time, lack of consistency, and often lack of funds
What it means in my house: kids don't get away with Jack, we are a united front, ALL. THE. TIME.

Small Community Privilege: small towns have it, big towns don't
What it means in the world for those who don't have it: can feel alone, feel like no one has your back, you are one in many
What it means in my house: everyone in town knows us/their parents, everyone knows what car we/the kids drive, everyone knows the behavior we expect from our boys, we are held accountable by our community, our community supports us

Middle Class Privilege: most people in America have it, some don't
What it means in the world for those who don't have it: might not know where your next meal is coming from, won't have all the "things" that the other kids/people have
What it means in my house: we go on vacation as a family every year, kids and adults get spirit wear when they play a sport, they get to go on optional ($$) field trips with school, we get to go out to dinner once a month or so, we never have to worry if the utilities are being turned off

American Privilege: Americans have it, other people don't
What it means in the world for those who don't have it: not as many choices or freedoms, not a culturally diverse, etc.
What it means in my house: we honor those who served in the past to free us from oppressors, we honor those who serve us now to keep us from oppression and keep us safe, we can start a business, go to whatever church we want

White Privilege: white people have it, other people don't
What it means in the world for those who don't have it: get looked at second, second choice, feel/treated inferior
What it means in my house: I don't have an answer for this

My boys have all of the above! They are privileged for sure! But they didn't earn any of these things. We are quick to remind them they are in the Middle Class because Tim and I work hard and take on extra jobs and start businesses; they are fairly big fish in a small pond because we chose to raise them here, they are blessed their parents work hard at their marriage EVERY DAY to stay in love and together, and the other privileges they were born into and have no bearing on anything they did so they can't brag about it-it's how God saw a plan for their life so they better work it well.

Thus, my next line of thought becomes, when a group is not the same-meaning some have a privilege and some don't; what is our obligation to make everyone have the same privilege?
Can that happen? [I don't think so]
Should that happen? [This is what I am pondering]
Or did God give us all a different position in life for a purpose? Think of Queen Esther in Veggie Tales, as Cousin Mordecai said, Esther was Queen, "For such a time as this..."

Power Grab

"There's no way to rule innocent men. The only power any government has is the power to crack down on criminals. Well, when there aren't enough criminals, one makes them. One declares so many things to be a crime that it becomes impossible for men to live without breaking laws."

— Ayn Rand, Atlas Shrugged.

I have been in a funk lately. I think it's non-interaction with other humans. I'm not good reaching out on the phone. I haven't seen many people in person. I think I need to read Atlas Shrugged again, it tends to center me on the business side of my personality. And bonus, I can't read it in a short period of time, it takes me awhile.

Maybe it's because Eli is graduating and we can't have the things that I've been looking forward to to commemorate this milestone. I need to jump in another Bible study too. And clean my house. And make dinner, always the making dinner!

Directive

Every day, a new "directive" from the government pushes our small business closer and closer to falling into the pit of despair.

I refuse to be pushed over the edge into despair by people who don't understand business, much less my industry or my business in particular. If we make a bad decision and fail, that's on us. I refuse to be shamed for wanting my business succeed and making decisions to ensure it's going concern. I refuse to be shamed by a welfare state and mentality. I refuse to give up on capitalism.

I haven't fallen off the face of the Earth

I haven't posted in what, five years? The boys are of an age that I'm not comfortable telling their stories, so I pretty well quit blogging. They are where most of my stories come from!

However, I need an outlet. I work for our business at home, so no co-workers. Well, with no school for the foreseeable future, I have all of the boys :) I started a facebook post but decided, I really just needed to get it out, not for people to see it. And since no one really reads this blog, it's fine here!

Born With It

I believe we are all born with certain tendencies. After giving birth to four boys who have the same parents and live in the same house, I can see some things they are born with. I have one boy who talks incessantly and one you have to pull information out of. Why is that? Nature and nurture are the same for these boys. I believe it is the way the genes shook out this time-they were born that way. Does it make one boy better than the other? I don't believe so. Does it make one boy right and one boy wrong? I don't believe so.

Do I hold both boys to the same standards in our home? Yes I do. Do I expect to be answered every time I address them? Yes, whether you are the boy who likes to talk or the one who doesn't like to talk. If I speak to you, you respond. Regardless of the tendency you were born with, that is irrelevant, you are expected to live up to the standard. Just like I hold them both to the standard of not talking just to hear their own voice or talking over people. 

Now is one of those things easier to comply with for each boy? Yes, they are. 

Do the standards change based on what is easier for an individual boy? No, it does not.

Are standards universal? Yes, they are.

As you can see, I believe a person has the responsibility to control their own actions regardless of the tendencies they have, or "were born with" if you will.

Then comes the issue of standards. I get mine from the Bible. Where do you get yours? 

There are those who have a different belief system or some other framework for standards, and I do not deny them that right. In my belief system God gives us free will. Free will to make both right and wrong choices, free will to adhere to a different system of beliefs and set of standards. But it does not take away my right to my beliefs and standards because someone else thinks them wrong.